Can a Black Man Be Responsible for His Children?
Black Gay Fathers Attacked by Black Social Media Followers
This post and picture has gotten hateful responses from twitter after it went viral this past week. The picture depicts a popular social media black gay couple Kordale and Kaleb who are raising 3 children along with the mother. The outrage mostly appearing to be from black men was vicious and white blogs like Queerty where the post originated reported from their perspective that comments like ‘Finally a BLACK gay couple’ and ‘Well it’s good to see BLACK men taking responsibility for Black children’ as “negative.” There is truth that the depiction of gay male couples in the media are often interracial when major black celebrities come out and it appears that the white community is much more accepting. Concerning the outrage is it possible that the black community can palate then dismiss interracial couples better by viewing the black man as a traitor but seeing two black gay men in a relationship as undeniable and deemed too much reality? The interesting thing about the responses that we will never know is how many of the black men who posted the negative comments have a relationship and are raising their own children. In addition how much of the hatred comes from jealousy and envy from those who are unable to sustain any kind of loving relationship or from conservative religious black people. The bottom line is we all deserve to have our opinion but we are not free from hypocrisy in the process. Has the black community become so accustomed to black children being fatherless that we would prefer to see our children grow up fatherless as well or worse yet caught up in the system of abusive foster homes. Some may ask what’s wrong with raising children to be progressive thinkers in the ever-changing world. Are the hateful responses from the black community the reason many black men remain closeted and where the birth of DL culture begins which the Black community also despises? Can we really have it both ways or simply live and let live? If heterosexual couples raise gay children (and it happens all the time) then why can’t gay couples raise heterosexual children?
Black Straight Father Attacked by White Social Media Followers
Ironically, a Los Angeles heterosexual man, Doyin Richards, posted a pic of himself doing his daughter’s hair in the mirror and he was also viciously attacked this time by mostly white people on social media with comments like. ‘I would bet anything that you’re a deadbeat dad,’ and ‘Cute picture. Now why don’t you hand the children back to their mom so you can go back to selling drugs or your bootleg rap CDs?’
To add another level or irony the target in Doyin’s case (black men who refuse to take responsibility for their children in any way) are also the ones (by the negative responses) who targeted Kodale and Kaleb. Children deserve to have two parents and they deserve to be loved and cared for right? Well if that’s the case then how is it that the oppressed turns around and becomes the oppressor without rectifying his own responsibilities to his children first? What’s the problem, what’s the fear and why the outrage?
Can a black man be a father to his children AT ALL? The couple Kordell and Kaleb posted a response to the hatred to HuffPost Gay voices that read…
As far as the positive; yes we are two gay men with three kids who have no problem with preparing them for their education every morning; that comes with anything and everything they may need for school! Our kids are blessed to have three parents (Kordale, Kaleb and their Mother) who love, care and support them in every decision they have made and will continue to make as they get older. We are blessed to have the ability to provide for them in ways that a lot of people cannot for their family, which ultimately makes us happy knowing that they don’t want for much! Our main objective as parents is to provide, love, educate, support, encourage, and love some more!
In regard to the negative, people fail to realize that we are people too with kids who love us. We do what is necessary for them to succeed in this ever-changing world but it’s sad that we’re discriminated against because of our sexuality and/or what we do behind closed doors — which is no one’s business. In the same breath, we take all of what’s been said in stride. The picture was put out on social media for an opinion so we can’t be mad when people give just that: an opinion. People tend to think that gay people cannot raise their children to be heterosexuals. Instead, they have derogatory thoughts of us “tainting” our children or “confusing them” with what society sees deems as wrong an unmanly because we’re gay. But this is all comical because people forget where a lot of gays come from: a heterosexual household.
This is another prime example of where we are as a nation in 2014 — continuous discrimination against gays. Being gay is the new normal for a lot of people and judgement isn’t needed, just equality! We may be gay but this does not mean we are incapable of what a heterosexual couple is capable of! Us gays are just as educated and passionate about what we do and how we do it!
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